Do It- Be Vulnerable-Get to the other side!!!

Ok- So this is actually happening.

All of my life I have been told I could not sing.  It always confused me because I sang so well in cars or when my dog and I were hanging out.  I have always loved singing.

So, recently I took a challenge.  There is a woman in Albuquerque who teaches singing.  Once a year she takes 12 people and works with them on singing.  Only, we only work for 5- 2 hour- blocks.  Yup- 10 hours together.  That is for 12 people.  You do the math.  At the end of this each person performs 2 solos in front of a live audience of at least 120 people.  The performance is called, “Pyromaniac cafe”.  It is a fire walk.

I took the challenge.  I want to sing.  I am sick to death of my shame telling me I will make a fool out of myself.  As if that matters.  I am beyond caring what my perfectionism demands of me.  I want to sing.  I don’t need a record contract or to go on American Idol.  I just want to get past the point where I am self conscious of my singing.  I want to belt out a Christmas carol and have fun.

So, I am one rehearsal away from the performance and it has been a kick-a__ experience.  I have felt sick to my stomach, cried, thought of quitting, felt so sad, and been excited beyond excitement.  I am doing this.  I am going to walk through my vulnerability, letting myself be mediocre, and having fun.

I have truly had enough of this shame getting in the way of me doing things I want to do.  I have faced many of these in my life, and this is by far the scariest.  Maybe because it is so public.  Maybe because it covers my joy.  But- I am doing it.

On the Ides of March, in Albuquerque, I am performing at the Pyromaniac cafe with 11 other brave women.  Just wanted you to know!

2 comments

  1. Way to Go Barb! I’d love to be there to hear you sing and I know it is fabulous already! It is wonderful that you are truly standing in the light of your truth, erasing totally the lie of shame…YaY. Tia

  2. Wow!!!! Congratulations! How brave and beautiful you are Barb. I wish I could have heard you sing.

Leave a Reply

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *